Chapter 11 - Ella comes home

Ella left the hospital after three nights.
No oxygen.
Feeding normally.
Alert.
Smiling at a nurse as if nothing had happened.
I cried again.
At home, I removed every medication from the lower floor.
Locked everything.
Then checked the lock.
Then checked again.
Luke watched.
“Sarah.”
“Don’t.”
He stopped.
Good.
Margaret was prohibited from contact under a temporary safety plan while child protective services and police investigated.
She called Luke repeatedly.
He did not answer at first.
Then he did.
In the garage.
I heard only part.
“Mom, no.”
Pause.
“You gave her something.”
Pause.
“I don’t care what you thought.”
Pause.
“No, Sarah did not do this.”
That was the first time I heard him defend me without being forced.
It should have comforted me.
Instead I thought:
Hospital room.
Margaret:
Tell us what you did to that baby.
May you like
Luke standing silent behind her.
Some silences do not disappear when later words arrive.